The Curvy Girl Dating Podcast
The Curvy Girl Dating Podcast
Episode 34: Dating Tips For When It's Hot AF
In Episode 34 of The Curvy Girl Dating Podcast, Cristina addresses the unique challenges and joys of dating during the hot spring and summer months for plus-size women. She shares personal anecdotes and practical advice on managing body insecurities, sweating, and chafing while maintaining confidence. Cristina underscores the importance of mindset, wearing comfortable and flattering outfits, and embracing one's curves. She offers numerous date ideas that are both fun and accommodating to warmer weather, encouraging listeners to enjoy the season without letting body image concerns hold them back. The episode is packed with tips to help curvy women feel confident and comfortable while dating in hotter climates.
00:00 Introduction to The Curvy Girl Dating Podcast
00:45 Challenges of Dating in Hot Weather
02:33 Building Confidence and Embracing Your Body
04:54 Fashion Tips for Summer Dating
08:22 Practical Tips for Staying Comfortable
16:08 Date Ideas for Summer
19:36 Conclusion and Encouragement
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You are listening to The Curvy Girl Dating Podcast, Episode 34: Dating Tips for When it's Hot As Fuck Hi, I'm Cristina. After 10 years of dating, I was tired of attracting the wrong type of guys and thinking I had to lose weight to find love. I finally figured out how to date and I found the love I thought I would never find each week. I'll teach you dating advice, share dating stories and help you ditch the dating drama. My goal is to help you have fun and create the life you love. If you're ready to take your dating to another level, then listen up and let's go. Hello, welcome to The Curvy Girl Dating Podcast. I am Cristina, your favorite dating coach for plus-size women So today I'm excited because we're gonna talk about dating during the spring and summer months. It's hot and it's yucky and dating can be so uncomfortable, but it can also be fun. It's equal parts fun and frustrating. And when you're plus size, you get a little bit more uncomfortable or sweating in spots. I don't want to sweat in, like under my boobs, and all my little creases. I don't like being outside in the summer and feel like I need to mentally prepare, especially whenever it comes to going on a date. It's even more uncomfortable because you've probably never met this person or just saw them a few times before now you're gonna be outside and your brain starts going crazy."What the hell am I gonna wear? What if I start sweating? What if he could see my pit stains?" Stuff like that, it's extra self-consciousness coming into your brain and going crazy, at least for me. It took me some time to figure out how to really enjoy the spring and summertime months and date and go out with my friends and be out in uncomfortable weather and be okay with it. So it took me some time to figure it out, but once I did, I got better at going out and enjoying my life Like right now I am continuously going on walks and taking my dogs to the dog park because they need to exercise and get out of the house. I want to acclimate to the hot weather. We've been going out, three or four times a week on walks or to the dog park so we can start getting ready for this warm weather. I don't want to get too off topic. So, when it comes to dating in the spring and summer is all about the mindset right? Nothing is cuter than confidence. So be cute, be confident. Get your mindset straight, and that's a good start. The good thing about the summer, some of the pros about the spring and the summer is the time change, right? There's longer days in the summertime after the time changes. There's more festivals to go to more people are out and about, people are doing vacations the days are just getting better and people are getting out of their hibernation and enjoying the nicer days. And again, this comes with triggers like body insecurity, right? Oh my God, I have to wear shorts," or the idea of wearing swimsuits or showing your arms, people obsessed with their summer bodies. It's not just about what you're wearing, it's about what you're listening to, what you're hearing other people are saying, and it gets stuck in your brain and you see it on social media. Everyone's talking about their obsession with their summer bodies and they have to do their diet and be disciplined because they're gonna go on a vacation and they want to wear a specific swimsuit or whatever, and there is nothing wrong with that. That is totally fine. I am all about everybody having goals, whether it's a physical goal, health or weight or, being toned or having more muscle or fitting into an outfit, whatever it is that you wanna do. I'm all about goals, but, I'm also about loving the body that you're in right now and being comfortable with who you are right now at this moment. Even though you have goals and might be on this journey to change your body up. Doing it with love is the best way because we want to change our mindset. We're not gonna change anything about our bodies in a good way if we're talking shit about it the whole time. Loving the person you are right now and on the way to the person you're gonna be, and what your body's gonna change into that is okay either way. So you don't need to shrink yourself to be desirable. You just need to show up. get a few key items that you're confident in for the summer. My favorite recommendation is to have a little wardrobe capsule for dates specifically, so that you always have a go-to of things that make you feel confident. So, that's the dating mindset thing, is getting your brain straight, realizing that you are not going there to be chosen you're going on this date to see if you're compatible with somebody. So the other thing that's awesome about dating in the warmer months other than the longer days, and you have more time for dates and stuff, is you can be flirty with some of your outfits Your outfits can show off your curves in a positive way where you do feel curvy and confident and you feel good about yourself. A little off shoulder top might be something that you would be willing to wear, or a flowy dress. I love bold colors. For me, I didn't like to show my arms. That is one thing that I was very self-conscious about, and I still am, but I'm getting a lot better about it. I didn't wanna wear tank tops so I would always wear something with, sleeves, even if they were short sleeves or t-shirts or things like that would be so hot and uncomfortable. So then I started getting cute kimonos that were a lighter fabric. Even though they were a lighter fabric and more flowy, they felt fine. But sometimes in this Houston weather. They were really sticky and itchy and uncomfortable to wear. So eventually I found that off shoulder tops were a really good compromise for me because I was okay with showing my shoulders and collarbone, but I didn't like the actual arm part. So if I had a top that would cover my arms yet still give me a little bit of skin on top. I felt confident. I felt a little sexier. I wasn't trying to be somebody I wasn't, I just found outfits that worked for me and helped me figure out how I can still embrace my curves. That's another pro. And also, there's more events to meet people in real life. You don't have to meet people only online. That's not the only option. You can meet people organically when you go out. Dating in the summer months is great because you can go out with your friends and meet more people. The more you're out, the more people you meet, take the time to go out and embrace the opportunities in the summer and say yes to try new things and meet new people. Of course there's cons with every pro. The sweating, it doesn't matter what outfit you're in, you might feel confident as hell and you're probably gonna sweat in it, and that's okay. Sweating doesn't mean it's ugly or bad It's just what it is. Any guy you're getting to know and seriously considering dating long term. isn't gonna care if you're sweating. They wanna get to know you. They don't wanna know if you're gonna sweat in the summer. Who doesn't sweat in the summer? Of course everybody sweats in the summer, especially if you live in Texas. People sweat. They're probably sweating too because they're nervous, because you're amazing and they can't wait to talk to you and get to know you more. It's gonna be okay. Sweating doesn't make you ugly. The right person is gonna be mature about it and understand that people sweat when it's fucking hot outside So that's an easy con that you can cross off the list. Don't worry about it. One thing that I used to really worry about was chafing. Always used to wear, biker shorts or compression shorts under my dresses, sometimes even under my shorts. If my shorts would ride up, I would want to have something to prevent myself from chafing. But that was a real concern for me. I've lost some weight and so my thighs aren't as loving as they used to be with each other. But I still need to wear compression shorts a lot of times when it's really hot or if I know I'm gonna be outside for a long time. wearing the right undergarments is very important. Winter, summer, spring, anytime, like underwear is important, so if you want to wear compression shorts or shorts underneath your dresses to keep your legs from chafing, that is my go-to trick. There are also lots of body creams and other products. I like some arm hammer spray that I put on my thighs so they don't chafe. They have body deodorant now that you can put under your little boobies or big boobies. I've got little ones. Just anything that you need that's appropriate to get the sweating under control and work on things that might chafe you. But if you know that you are wearing shorts that are gonna rise up, don't wear them on the date. Don't wear them ever. Just find some new shorts or know that you're gonna wear them when you're not sitting outside for hours at a concert. Find things that make sense for you, okay? Don't wear things out that you're gonna constantly need to adjust because it's gonna keep you off your game all day and you're gonna be worried about that not enjoying yourself and just enjoying your life, being comfortable. Find something else to wear and stop adjusting your outfit all the time. So yes, there's a lot of pressure in finding something to keep you comfortable but. It is doable. You will sweat and it's gonna, be uncomfortable, but there's gotta be a medium where you have an acceptable amount of sweatiness. So anyways, you get it right. There's great things about, going out in the spring and summer and there's not so great things. So that was a little bit of the uglier side than the pros of the longer days and the festivals and the things to do, right? So right now is a great time to start thinking about trying on your clothes. Do they fit? Are they comfortable? Do they ride up? Do they stick to your body? Is it a good fabric to wear? Those are things that you should probably be thinking about. And it doesn't mean you need to go buy a whole new wardrobe or anything, but with what you have, you can pick out some things that are better than others, just period. Wear those light fabrics, linen, breathable cotton, flowy maxi dresses, wear those compression shorts if you need to, prevent chafing people get rashes in different areas. So again, body deodorant, anti chafing things and any kind of barrier that you could use to help prevent that is gonna help you be more comfortable. So the fabrics that you're gonna wear and doing your sweat proofing is number one way to beat the heat and be ready for that date. I like to carry a little fan, like a little, hand fan. The ones that you carry in your purse and you open it, what is it called? an accordion fan. I carry one of those in the summer. I'm not ashamed and as nerdy as it is, I have one of those neck things that, people wear all the time at Disney World or whatever. It's like a neck fan. I'm not ashamed to wear it, I'm gonna wear it if it's hot as hell. If I'm walking my dogs this summer, you're gonna see me with a neck fan. But you're gonna wish that you had one. Instead of making fun of me, you should consider getting one because I'm gonna be the one that's comfortable and beating the heat at least from the neck up. So anyways, don't be afraid to find something that's gonna assist you in, feeling comfortable. At the same time, there's hand fans that people have. I've had a fan that you plug into your phone. The only bad thing about that is it sucks up your phone battery. But if you wanna be comfortable, talking on the phone or have air conditioning. Don't be afraid of color either, like with different fabrics, you're trying different things to see if it's something that you like. Try different colors, maybe there's a different color out there that's going to work really well with your body or your skin tone. One thing I will tell you I've done before in Galveston, they have a huge. Sandcastle competition and I went to the sandcastle competition with my friend Carla a long time ago. And I was so hot and so sweaty. It was bad and I was wearing this magenta tank top and it had flowers on it my neck was so sweaty, it looked like I was drenched in water. If I dumped water on my head my shoulders were just sweating it was embarrassing for me at the moment because I was just thinking,"oh my God, I'm sweating so much." My neck was all wet and thankfully there was a vendor giving out cooling towels that you soak in water and put around your neck that was really helpful because I could get it wet and wear it around my neck. Not looking cute, obviously having this big wet towel while walking through the beach looking at sandcastles. But did I really give a shit? No, because I was comfortable, it was a great gift to have from a great vendor. And do I remember who they were? No, I'm so sorry. But they really saved the day for me that day. Just think about fabrics, like when you sweat, is it going to be super obvious, like when you are wearing a white shirt and you get it wet and you can see through it? Just consider that as well. It's a minor detail that people probably wouldn't think of, but since it happened to me, I'm just letting you know. Think about the fabrics and the color, when you're sweating and wearing it. Think about the dates that you're gonna go on and find something that's appropriate for it. You are not gonna wear high heels to a golf tournament, you know? So if dressing up, wearing different clothes in the summer, that's gonna show your body a little bit more if that's holding you back from dating completely, and you're like,"hell no. I'm not gonna show any skin long sleeves and pants and jeans and turtleneck for the summer, and that's who I am. And I am not gonna do anything to start dating if this is what it's gonna require me to start dating." If what you're wearing is stopping you from dating, then you need to schedule a consult with me'cause we're gonna date this summer. I am here for you. So if you are ready to date and you think that summer is the worst time ever because you're struggling with the idea of showing a little more skin this summer, or not sweating when you meet somebody for the first time, if that's stopping you from dating, you need to meet with me and we need to talk about it, and I'm happy to have a consultation with you and give you some tips on how to move on from that so that you can go on a date. There's no reason in the world for you to not date because of an outfit. Just go out and wear whatever you want as long as you feel good. What are some date ideas you can go to? I've already mentioned a few, like going to concerts or festivals. I like going to the farmer's market in the morning. I like morning dates because then you could just go home afterwards and think about it, or go do something for the rest of the night. But, going to breakfast. having brunch on a patio is a great date. Walk in the park, going to the beach, having a walk. You don't have to wear a bathing suit. You can just go for a walk and wear shorts, it's fine. And wear a t-shirt, don't let things like that stop you from dating. If you want to go on a walk on the beach, go on a walk on a beach. You don't have to wear a bathing suit, just go. you know? But anyways, art festivals, music festivals. There's so many things you could do. Amusement parks, mini golf is always fun, it could be a cute date. There's a lot of opportunities to flirt when you're doing mini golf or top golf. Brunch, mimosas, things like that. There's a lot of places that you can go to avoid outside. There's indoor venues that you can go to that are just fine, So also consider that. Just because it's spring, you can be creative and find indoor things that you like, you know. Don't have to be scantily clad or anything. But yeah, there's creative ways to think about things to do in the summer that's indoors. If that's where your mind is and that's where you wanna be that's okay. I know a lot of times, it's great for a guy to lead and plan dates, and it shows some initiative that somebody's interested in you or they're taking a little effort to plan a date. I know that all of that is great, but sometimes you've got to make sure that you're gonna do something that makes you comfortable. Offer some suggestions of what you want to do to make sure you are comfortable. Don't say yes to a 3:00 PM patio lunch in the middle of July in Houston when you're gonna pass out in the middle of the date. Don't say yes to those dates. If that's not gonna make you comfortable or confident, then that's a straight up no. Be proactive and make some suggestions for dates that will make you comfortable and allow you to be confident. So what does that look like? What is something that you would like to do in the spring that would make you comfortable that you can offer as a date? It can be a coffee date. People could get coffee every day of the year. So there's nothing wrong with that, just'cause it's spring, you could still do that. Who cares, right? Get an iced coffee, but, step in front and give yourself the permission to be proactive and give suggestions. Let yourself have a little bit of control on where you're gonna go and what you're gonna do. You have to wear the confidence just like you're wearing an outfit. Your confidence is part of your outfit. It's gonna be right in your face. If you're adjusting your clothes checking yourself out, or constantly looking around it's not gonna show the confidence you want to express on a date. So wear confidence and feel comfortable in what you are wearing and what you're going to do, because you'll be able to wear your confidence a lot better. Understand that confidence is part of your outfit. I hope that's some information that you can get about dating in the summer. There's still a lot to do. You can still adjust your outfits to wear your confidence. And make sure that you have done all the proper precautions to make sure that you are as sweat proof as possible, but also know that you're gonna sweat too and it's normal and the right guy is not gonna judge you for that. So there's a lot to consider and it doesn't need to be that hard, Go out, and just meet somebody. So just do something that makes you feel you. Do not think that you need to shrink your body or hide your body to be somebody that you're not. So just know that your body doesn't need to be a barrier for you to find love and for you to go out. Enjoy the summer. Enjoy the spring. And we'll talk next week. Bye.